What are you tolerating?
New year's resolutions "work" for me. When I say it works for me, that doesn't mean I always accomplish what I set out to do. It’s really about just having a goal and letting all the other happy accidents fall into place. Sure, I've wanted to lose x lbs and set out on my mission on January 1st ready to take on the world, only to fizzle out within a few days.
OK. So what. Does that mean I stop setting goals? No.
2023 isn't that different, in that I still made a conscious decision to start/stop something. I know, you're dying to hear what my goal for the year is, so here it is.
To wear pants. Every day that I can.
Hold your horses! I am not saying that I don't wear any pants during my day. I’m saying, instead of my workout clothes (aka: "my uniform"), I'll be wearing "traditional" pants, with a zipper and a button, (mostly) every day.
A few years ago, I intentionally started my day with putting on my workout clothes. The plan was to eliminate excuses and blockers from working out. I have a desk job and sometimes I'll have under 2k steps by 4pm. It happens. I know exercise and movement are very important and should be a priority. Well, this was my solution! It worked, until it didn’t.
What I finally admitted to myself at the end of 2022, was that I wasn't making the time during my day, and I was tolerating something that was no longer working for me. I was wasting a ridiculous amount of mental energy planning gym time into my day and constantly moving it around or cancelling. I began feeling resentful, beating myself up for "being so lazy", telling myself I will do it the next day, and maybe skipping a shower (or three???).
Staying physically active is important to me. My job and the work I produce are important to me. I suppose, showering is important, too. Attention and focus are already a challenge and I need all the tools in my toolbox as it is. I needed something to change, and I decided to start with putting some pants on in the morning.
What’s happened for me in the past 11 days of doing this?
my focus is better,
the negative self-talk and resentments (aka: being the victim) has quieted, and
I've been to the gym 8 times since January 1st.
I prioritized a specific time that works for me, which also serves to mark the end of the workday. I'm not running on sheer will. I do have an accountability buddy and we just agree to share when we are going to the gym and invite the other to join if they can. I take each day as it comes, and it is working for me at the moment.
Will this stick? Who knows. What I do know is that I’m meeting my goal to the best of my ability, and I feel good about it. That’s really all that matters.
With this seemingly insignificant decision, I realize what I've really been wanting. I want to show up for myself. Only then, can I show up whole and authentic in other spaces and for other people.
And now, I ask you. What have you been tolerating?
